This week, we're questioning a little coaching dogma, challenging worst-case scenarios, and contemplating an unexpected threat to Benny's spots.
🍽 The Main Course: One, and Done?
I have a little confession.
I've found myself reluctant to share something about my coaching practice when I'm with other coaches:
I offer single-session coaching.
There. I said it.
In a profession where three-, six-, and twelve-month packages are the norm, the idea that someone might book one session, get what they need, and go on their merry way can raise a few eyebrows.
But I feel like that's a bit ironic. I mean, in these same coaching circles, we have group sessions where someone gets 10 or 20 minutes of focused coaching. And everyone marvels at what can happen in such a short conversation!
Recently, for example, a woman who thought she needed coaching to figure out whether or not she wanted to have children realized that her real concern was whether she can trust her partner to share the responsibilities of parenting.
Fifteen minutes... and suddenly she's asking herself a very different question.
But, gasp! Suggest I'm offering a single session to clients without requiring a long-term commitment? I guess that's pushing it.
When did the value of getting help become tied to how many months we're getting it? Who decided it takes a certain amount of time?
Sometimes we make getting help into such a big deal that we end up never getting it at all. Obviously, some things are complicated, and having ongoing help is incredibly valuable and necessary. I'm not arguing otherwise.
But there are plenty of times when we just need someone to help us see what we may be missing. Or to ask us a question we hadn't thought to ask ourselves.
Sometimes we just need someone to spot the thing we've been staring at for so long we can't see it anymore. Like the typo in a newsletter we've proofread eight times. 😉
And just because making a change takes time, it doesn't mean we need someone along side us every single step of the way.
Maybe you're frustrated that you keep eating long after you're full, but you're not sure you're ready to unpack you're entire history of food. Or maybe there's a family dynamic that's bothering you, but you don't particularly want to revisit 30 years of family drama just to figure out how to get through Thanksgiving dinner.
So you put it off. Because if it's going to take six months of time, energy or money... no thanks.
But one conversation can be enough to get started. Maybe you want another one. Maybe not.
Is there something you've been putting off changing because getting help feels like too big a deal?
💡 Self-Coaching Strategy: The Other "What If?"
Ever notice how your brain can come up with 47 ways something might go wrong, but apparently can't think of a single way it might go right?
Our brains are wired to pay attention to potential threats. They're trying to keep us safe. Unfortunately, they don't always distinguish between an actual emergency and the possibility that you might hate your new job.
What if I take that job and hate it? What if I don't make any friends? What if I regret the whole thing?
Funny how rarely our brains volunteer the other possibilities.
What if I love the job? What if I meet some wonderful people? What if this turns out to be one of the best decisions I've ever made?
Here's something to try the next time you catch yourself spiraling through the scary what-ifs:
For every worry-filled "what if," come up with one or two equally plausible what ifs that goes the other way.
No, you're not trying to convince yourself that everything will turn out wonderfully. You don't know that any more than you know things will go badly. Both are possibilities.
But notice what happens when you consider those other possibilities. Do you feel a little less anxious? More curious? More willing to explore your options?
Sometimes that's enough to change what you do next.
🤣 Sweet-Scary Moments
Benny's brain: "WHAT IF I LOSE MY SPOTS?!"
Also Benny's brain: "What if it's just a nice breeze?"
Oh, Benny!
🐶
Got thoughts? Reach out!
Until next time - more dogs, less dogma. Always.
Carol
P. S. New here? Welcome! Curious about past issues? You can find them, here.
